Tuesday, 4 August 2015

One step at a time, but keep going

I've been feeling really uncertain lately. I am busy as fk and I hardly have time for leisure. I work, study, try to start up my own business. Each day is a race against time, how much can I get done? How much more do I have to do? But for all that I am doing, I feel that I am stepping in circles and stuck at the same spot while others progress in life - getting promotions, buying houses, travelling. Although I have a job, I am still far from being financially independent. I am lucky to have parents that give me a roof to live under and put food in my mouth. 

I just had my 25th birthday last week. Am I where I envisioned to be at this point in life? Far from it. Stuff has been happening at home that are taxing to the mind and body but that is life and you accept it and work through it. But I am definitely working hard and trying my best juggling all my responsibilities and commitment. Being caught in this whirlwind though, I have lost sight and am just living each day as it comes. Inspired by my sister and how she is consciously working to achieve her goals, I too am coming up with a list to tick off, and am calling it 'Small Steps Everyday'. 

I must remind myself that it does not matter how slow the journey, as long as I take each step earnestly. Everyone's journey is different. Never, no matter how tempting, compare myself with others. Never feel ashamed of my journey. Never underestimate myself. Never forget my values. Never give up. 

My 'Small Steps Everyday' List
1. Complete my Masters thesis and graduate - I am soooo happy with the provisional grade I got! But in order to turn that into the actual grade, I must fight with all I have on this FINAL leg of the journey. [End of September]
2. Complete my GCNZIA course and graduate with flying colours! - Being the over-ambitious person I am, I decided to take up a law course - complete tangent yeah, but I am enjoying this very much. Who knows what I'll be making a career out of, but this will be high on the possibilities. [Mid-November]
3. Fitness - Move it! Just get out the door! Marathon end of the year? Let's do it! Pick up a sport (yoga/dance?). [Ongoing]
4. Sleep is the best medicine. Sleep early, wake up early. Time to really stick to this sleep routine. [Ongoing]
5. Make time for leisure - make the effort to hang out with friends; work on my hobbies (photography, reading, baking, knitting, movies, singing, anything!). Dedicate at least half a day to one day per week for leisure. [Ongoing]
6. Independence. Stand on my own two feet. Find a stable (and well paid) job. This may take some time, but start with the little stuff. This also encompasses standing up for myself when need be.  [2016]
7. Stop being a cheapskate. Spend money when I need to, don't go for the cheap stuff as it will ultimately cost me more. Go for quality. But at the same time, learn to be content知足. [Ongoing]
8. At least ten minutes of quiet time everyday. To rest my mind. To reflect. 阿弥陀佛 [Ongoing]
9. Flipping go and get my citizenship. [By 2016]
10. Work on my skincare. [2016]
11. Start a charity project. [2016]
12. Continue learning Chinese Medicine/养生 [Ongoing]
13. Learn to say no. This also means stop overestimating my abilities. Don't bite off more than I can chew. [Ongoing]
14. Work on my talking/socialising skills. Everyone who knows me knows that I am 'the quiet one'. Learn to get out more. Get out of my comfort zone! Socialise more. [Ongoing]
15. Never slack off on appearance. I look good, I feel good. [Ongoing]
16. Start a diary and update AT LEAST once a week. [Ongoing]

Underlying all these goals, I should stop being frustrated at myself. Being happy means my temper/mood will improve and treat those around me better. 

This is a long list, but what are goals if they aren't challenging? 

Off I go to do my assignment for Goal no.2! And then sleep (Goal no.4). 

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